In this article we are going to be talking about Forgiveness. Is there something in your life that you just can’t seem to let go of? Has someone in your life really bothered you? You know you should forgive them but you just can’t forget or let go of what happened.
This happens to a lot of people – they know that forgiveness is something they should strive for but can’t quite get there which makes them feel even more guilty.
It’s no wonder, as the way in which we are taught to forgive makes it difficult. I think we are taught to forgive in a way that is all wrong; we are told we should forgive and forget and it feels that we are letting that person off the hook.
This also makes us feel that anybody can do anything to us and we will say it is OK. This can make us feel vulnerable to being attacked again in the same way by that person and that we will just let them off the hook.
It is healthy for us to have boundaries and personal integrity so the usual advice on forgiveness can cause conflict within us. So how can we get peace from the memory of the situation without feeling like we are allowing someone to get away with it?
First – you don’t need to forgive the person or be open to them do it again. What they did was not OK by you, you don’t want that to happen again.
If you change your perspective and realise that it is not the person that you need to let off the hook, but to understand the situation, then you can move towards healing within yourself. You need to understand and process why the situation has come into your life. Once you get that ‘aha’ moment then the inner shift can occur so that you can move on from the emotions.
In Simply Divine we discuss how the Black Hole Principle implies that we have aspects of our consciousness out of space and time beyond the speed of light. This is what is traditionally called the Higher Self.
This is the aspect of us that chooses our lives and everything that happens in it. The key to our healing is to move towards an understanding of why our Higher Self has introduced a particular incident and the healing journey that this has engendered.
What has been this gift in this?
Just asking the question ‘what has been this gift in this?’ can shift the entire feelings about a situation. Sometimes this type of work is so effective that the situation will not affect us anymore and we will feel much more free.
For more information on how you can access Simply Divine click here.
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Entering the Flipside of Spirit
I have seen it many times, someone undergoes a spiritual awakening and the world becomes all sunshine and rainbows. They just can’t believe their luck and the new world that has opened up to them. They meet people who are psychic and who want a world filled with possibilities and beauty.
They explore community living, chakras, crystals, tarot. They pinch themselves that just a few months ago they were wondering if there was more to life and now here they are in New Age play land.
Making these new connections it suddenly seems possible that a new Earth could arrive very soon – a beautiful utopian land based on love and peace.
And them boom – life hits them in the face and they are pushed to the point of near disillusionment. They experience events which makes them question everything they have just learnt.
This can take the shape of three phases
Usually what happens first is that the oh-so-lovely spiritual people that our new age newbie has just encountered show themselves as they really are – people so keen to escape their issues that they have wandered into the fluffiness of the New Age.
But their emotional traumas remain and show up just as before. This is even more confusing for the newbie as people seemingly so full of love and light up front turn around and act in a vicious manner.
This feels to the newbie as even worse then the ‘normal’ world they thought they had left as at least people there were more upfront about being ruthless. This is a pretty common occurrence for some stepping on the spiritual path.
2. Life events blow up
Another very common occurrence is that shortly after waking up spiritually, life events occur in the person’s life that can bring them to their knees: divorce, job loss and more. This blow up can cause most people to turn their back on spiritual awaking yet it is often not possible. Once out of the box, it cannot be put back in.
Often people lose out on the financial income that they enjoyed before. Many people have immense spiritual skills but they can’t find a way for these skills to lead to financial support.
It seems that the worlds of the spiritual and that of the material are very far apart. They start to lose faith in their own spiritual journey and become disillusioned with it all as ‘airy fairy’ nonsense that is not practical. They don’t see how to keep their integrity and make money.
3. The Road to Integration
This is the Flipside of spirituality and it can be painful. But this doesn’t have to be the point when someone jacks in their journeying and exploration (not that it is possible anyway). Andrew Harvey speaks of undergoing the initiation of the light and then the initiation of the dark.
The truth is we need both to become fully integrated on the journey. We need the dark and the light, the conscious and the subconsciousness, the spiritual and the practical, the immaterial and the material, the matter and the antimatter. If you follow my work you will know what I mean by that last example.
If you can ride the storm through this initiation of the dark and understand it for what it is you will be able to become a more integrated and clearer person. You can exist in the realms of the dimensions as well as have a job if this is what you want.
You will be able to see a lot of the New Age types for who they often are – people escaping from childhood emotional traumas. This means you will have a more balanced view of people and of the world that will put you in better positions than the initial floaty escapism that characterises spiritual newbies.
I am not judging this phase either – I have totally been there myself – we all have. It just becomes very confusing and I hope this article helps people to realise they are not alone in having similar issues blow up in their face. They don’t have to completely reject their spirituality when this happens but can move forward in a more integrated way.
In truth it is your own subconscious emotions and shadow self that are exploding and this is what is reflecting in the world ‘out there’. This insight will help you to navigate some of the most difficult storms.
I have created an online course called Simply Divine which is designed to help you to navigate the shifts including the dark night of the soul and connect more deeply to spirit. To find out more about Simply Divine click here.
Image Shutterstock – modified
To say I have been through a major crisis is an understatement. As some of you know, I went through a period of time when I lost my marriage, my career and home all within the space of a few months. I also faced an investigation into my mental health by the medical authorities instigated by my ex-husband during our split.
Suffice to say 2002 was a real crisis year and without the principles of the universe that I already knew about, I am not sure I would have got through it in the way that I did. So the scientific discoveries I had been making, even until that point were crucial in my recovery.
So here are the tips that helped me to get through a crisis gained from my awareness of how the universe works. I hope they help you.
1) Everything is a mirror of your emotions at some level even if these emotions originate in past lives.
Before this major crisis, I feared an investigation by the medical profession due to my spirituality. Of course, that is what I manifested. But on the flip side, once I was through it, I was through my biggest fear and although my bank balance suffered, I felt liberated.
During the investigation an interesting phenomenon happened – I developed a dark mark around my neck. I wondered if it was a noose mark leaving a multidimensional imprint from a hanging in a past life. I was with some spiritual people discussing the medical investigation into my mental health and I pointed out the mark.
One woman immediately piped up,”noose mark”. It was as if a fear regarding persecution from the authorities had leaked into my current life and was creating this investigation. The mark disappeared after a few days.
Sometimes it will take some searching but it is possible to find the emotional cause of events in your life. When I am working with clients, I scan their current lives, past lives and their multidimensional selves. It is in this way that we can often get to the root cause of what is holding someone back in the present moment. If are interested in having a multidimensional coaching session then get in touch with me using the contact page.
2) Your Higher Self sets up lesson from out of space and time to help you to understand and grow.
The purpose of life is NOT to feel comfortable but to learn the maximum amount whilst we are incarnated. This is how you grow your consciousness which is all you take with you when you eventually leave this world. But you are not a victim in all of this; an aspect of your own being can see the big picture from beyond space and time and it is this aspect of you that sets up your life lessons.
We are all multidimensional and it is from this perspective that we set up your life lessons. I knew even in the height of my difficulties that I had set this up myself in order to get me on my true path. And indeed I left the medical profession and have been on my true path ever since.
3) A crisis is feedback.
Even in the midst of the worst argument or conflict you can see the reflection of your shadow. Take a mental note of what you pick up from a situation about yourself and journal on it later. A simple example – say somebody is arguing and hurling names at you, make a mental note of what these names are and if any of them hurt more than the others.
if you feel triggered by what is said, then there are probably some underlying emotions that you can do work on later by journalling for example. You may actually believe what is being said about you at a subconscious level.
I am not suggesting you necessarily try to do this in the heat of the moment, but by shifting your awareness like this, the crisis may shift too. So a crisis becomes a feedback opportunity for your own growth.
4) Ask for help
Realistically, I think very few of us bare our souls to others outside of our family. We often give the impression that everything is wonderful as we are afraid of the shame and the vulnerability that comes if we say that we are going through a hard time.
However if we do reach out to a friend when in a crisis you will be surprised at how people will gladly come to your assistance. Some will leave your life but they were probably looking for you to confer some sort of status on them and, if you are not matching up to their projections, they will leave your life and that is OK.
But there will be some friends who are genuine and if you reach out to them in a crisis you may find that they are true friends and you depend on them in a crisis.
5) Be kind to yourself and try doing nothing.
Do the minimum that you have to do to get by but otherwise rest and do nothing for periods of time. In this time your emotions will be working themselves out so it may look like you are doing nothing but internally you are working like crazy.
Taking this time will help you to heal in order to move onto the next stage of your life. So don’t feel guilty for doing nothing – this is a really essential step for your recovery during a crisis.
I hope this has given you some tools for handling the next crisis you go through. If you would like some more strategies that come from the deeper understanding of the cosmos then have a look at Simply Divine – an easy guide to the Science of spirituality. Click the button below for more.
Image:Graphic Stock/ Dr Manjir Samanta-Laughton
In my first book, Punk Science I described how areas of the universe are made up of matter which we are familiar but also the universe is made up of antimatter.
The process of these coming together to make light in the form of gamma-rays is a process that occurs in black holes which I have described before, but did you know it may be key in your own life?
Building on the work of Dr John Demartini, author of The Breakthrough Experience, I also realised that the antimatter region of your own self may represent your shadow emotions – those aspects of you that you do not want to face.
Dr John Demartini author of the Breakthrough Experience. Credit Dr Manjir Samanta-Laughton
Life, however will provide you with opportunities with which to face your shadow self – this is what we call the journey of life. It is how we handle these events that determines the level of transformation that they give us.
I hear a lot of spiritual teachers, some of them very famous, who tell you to ignore your emotions and people who may bother you in life. I teach the exact opposite; it is in the difficult events and people where the real treasure lies.
These events hold the clues to your own shadow self and emotions and it is by integrating your matter and antimatter in your own consciousness that you can increase the light in your being – just like in a galactic black hole!
This quick exercise can help you to integrate your shadow self and emotions.
If you would like to know more about the links between the science of the cosmos and your own life check out Simply Divine – an Easy guide to the Science of spirituality. You can find out more about the course here.